All Things Hetalia!
by aStRalBlaSt
Summary: Still doesn't have enough Hetalia in your life? Why don't you take a look at this! This fanfic contains trivias, history and of course COMEDY packed in one-shot type chapters. Warning: Randomness and shameless puns ahead. Also author has occasional hiatuses because of studies so be warned.
1. Color Coded Terracotta!

"Alright guys keep up the phase."

China was working on the First Emperor's tomb that day. He made a habit of working on reviving the Terracotta warriors whenever he has nothing to do. It was very chaotic as always. People kept digging stuffs and lifting clay here and there. China never seems to be tired of looking at how busy everyone is. In fact, it makes him alive.

"I found something," someone exclaimed while China was busy daydreaming.

It attracted a lot of people. And soon enough a lot of gasps and whispering was heard making China snapped on his daydreaming trance. "Yah! What are you guys being worked up about?!"

"We found a colored Terracotta warrior," one of the workers turned around to China and let him see the Terracotta warrior himself. China was surprised. For 2000 years, he already forgot that a finished Terracotta warrior has colors on it.

..

"I forgot," China smug and continued telling the other nations what he saw that day. "Being this old makes me forgot certain things."

"Ooooh~" Italy got intrigued and pulled his seatmates suit in excitement. "Japan isn't that fascinating? I want to see a Terracotta warrior in full color. I've seen a couple real ones but I never seen one that is in color."

"Unfortunately," China continued. "We do not know why, but the color suddenly evaporated minutes after we found it. We were all shocked. We even thought that some ghost will pop out of the clay."

"Well that is sad." France said and joined in the conversation. "Sculptures are normally not painted so this kind of art is very odd. It will be surely a great piece in some of my museums."

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" America laughed boisterously and appeared holding art supplies. "Then why don't we paint it ourselves. I will it color with my flags color scheme."

"You brat," England shouted and sighed. "That will be a dishonor from the original piece. You just don't go there and destroy one of the world's renowned arts."

"Yes, England is right." Japan nodded and said. "Besides that is the tomb of the very first Emperor America. If you defile that the very first emperor of China will be very angry at you. Did you know that the very first emperor of China is very ruthless? "

"What?!" America felt chill on his spine. Japan's words made him loss his motivation from painting the Terracotta warriors on what he wanted.

"I'm happy that you guys are very interested on this. We still hope that we can found some new Terracotta warriors with colors still intact with them. But at the same time I don't."

"Why so China?" Italy asked.

"What if it disappears again? We will lose another valuable artifact. I wonder who can help me with it." China said, sinking into deep thought.

"I can help." After being silent the whole time, Germany stood up and finally spoke. "I do not know if my help will be any useful but if you need some help I could try."

"Really?" China asked which Germany nodded.

"Isn't that great China? Germany will help you." Italy said while rocking left and right happily.

"First we can layer a certain type of plastic on the clay and then….and then… Ah Yes! We can laser it out and then…. and then…."

"Ah…." France sighed and said. "Someone made Germany enthusiastic again."

"Could I hit him?" Russia brought out his pipe and smiled.

"NO!"

..

"Ah~ I guess China doesn't want my help." Canada sighed in the background.

"Who are you?"

"I'm Canada," Canada said to Kumajirou.

[A/N]

Did you know that there are actually two painted Terracotta warriors now in the world? Thanks to Germany's help it was made possible. I've seen it in the television and to tell you the truth I want the non-colored version.

Hi! Hi! I'm Astrablast. Some of you guys might know me but I am the author of "It's More Fun With Philippines!" It is a fanfic that tells the story of Philippines in a comedic but historical way in the Hetalia Universe.

After thinking of it in a while, I decided to create a fanfic with all of the characters of Hetalia. This fanfic will contain trivias and nonsense coming from me. I might not update as frequent like in my other fanfic because I don't have time to research for trivias and funny things. ((Normally my trivias about Philippines come to me)) So if you have one please PM me or review it to me!

Happy New Year everyone!


	2. Prisoner on the Loose!

"I finally broke free!" America shouted as he emerged from the ground he dig from. "No one will ever make me go back to that prison!"

"EVER!" He added as he run away from the prison, laughing.

"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA…..ha…..ha….HACHOOO!"

America started to shrivel from cold and let out a loud sneeze. It was only a couple of meters from the prison when a very, very cold wind rushed into his orange overalls and throughout his body.

"Cold! Cold! Cold!" America tried to make his shelf warm by rubbing his hands on his body. He even went as far as doing squats but it proved to be pointless nonetheless. He stopped for a while and surveyed his surroundings. It was pitch white and it was freezing like hell. He couldn't find anything to take shelter in.

He left off a deep sigh and rolled his eyes. "No choice then."

He turned around and went back to the prison. He banged the door like crazy and said, "Let me in. The Great America has escaped your prison so let me in. I don't want to go outside anymore. Prison life is much more fun. LET ME IN!"

[Author's Note]

Short one, sorry.

Did you know that there is a prisoner in Kentucky named Robert Vick who willingly turned himself in after breaking out of the prison? It is said that he did that because of the Polar Vortex phenomenon and there's a single digit temperature on America. Report shows that he went into some hotel after he broke out and phoned the police there, pleading that he wants to go back in prison.

Maybe it is much warmer inside? Will you do the same as well?

Here in my place it is already cold by tropical standard. I never ever imagined that I have to wear jacket every day. I can't even wear a short anymore!


	3. The Curse of The Mummy

England was boiling his pot of tea when he heard his telephone rang. He was hesitant at first to leave his boiling water but soon the telephone stopped ringing. It went silence for awhile which England wanted but this time it wasn't his telephone ringing but his cellphone.

"Mummy." The only audible word England heard from the call.

"Who is this?" England tightened the grip on his phone and waited for some feedback. He knew the caller was still there because he can hear the shivers from his hide. But nonetheless he looked at his phone to see if the caller does indeed still there.

"Hello?" England tried to communicate to his caller once again. "Is this you America?"

"Mhhhhmmm." The caller said that England identified as yes. "Please come here quickly."

Yes. It was indeed America. England looked at his watch and deduced that it was already night time at America's place. Watching horror movies again, was the only thought that crossed his mind.

"Why would I?" England grinned thinking of teasing America a little bit. "Are you frightened on the movies you watched again?"

"I'm not!" America said but England knew him too well to believe that. "If you are not coming here, I will come there myself."

"Are you crazy?!" England said. "You do realized that your plan is totally absurd."

"It isn't! I'm a hero so it will work out."

England sighed and tried to entertain him. "So? What movie did you watch this time?"

"The Mummy's curse."

"Huh?!" England smug and laughed. "That thing is not real."

"You are only saying that because you haven't watched it yet. I bet you that you will be scared after watching this. Not that I'm scared or anything, just so you know."

"I was right there. I knew the origins of the Pharaoh's curse you are so scared about."

"Wow you must be really old."

"Shut it git." England shouted and continued telling his tale. "You see it's not actually the Pharaoh's curse but it is actually a toxic chemical present on the tomb. Almost of the people who entered there was poisoned by it thus they died. I was one of those who survived because of my status as a nation. I can't believe someone will create a million bucks just for something so scientific. "

"Zzzzzzzz."

"Hey America?" England felt that there is an awful amount of silent on America's side and asked. "Are you sleeping on me?! Answer me America!"

England waited a couple of minutes but there was nothing. He just smiled and turned off his phone. "Well at least he finally fell asleep." England turned on his stove and tried to boil some water again. The last one already evaporated because he didn't turned it off in time.

[A/N]

The Pharaoh's curse or the Mummy's curse originated when a couple of Englishmen entered a royal tomb of King Tut in Egypt. It is said that after a few minutes of entering the tomb some already died. Then when you thought that it was all over after a few years of that encounter people who survived from the accident began to die one by one, creating the so called Pharaoh's curse.

Recent years, it was proven that the death of the people connected to the digging was not because of some sort of curse but actually because of a mold. Lab studies have shown some ancient mummies carried mold, including _Aspergillus niger_ and _Aspergillus flavus_, which can cause congestion or bleeding in the lungs. Lung-assaulting bacteria such as Pseudomonas and Staphylococcus may also grow on tomb walls killing people sometimes instant but mostly gradual.


End file.
